A blog by Shabana Saleem on parenting and parting from a family mediator and barrister in the Middle East.
Family Mediation
HOW DOES MEDIATION WORK?
Every family’s journey through mediation is different, but the process follows a clear and supportive path designed to bring structure and calm to what can otherwise feel overwhelming. From the very first conversation, mediation focuses on creating a safe, confidential space where each person can be heard and understood.
An opportunity to understand your situation, discuss goals, and explore whether mediation is right for you. Sessions can be joint or individual, providing a safe, neutral space to talk openly and set expectations for the process.
Both parties sign a framework confirming confidentiality, neutrality, and voluntary participation. It sets out how the mediation will run and ensures everyone feels supported, respected, and safe throughout each stage of discussion
Structured conversations led by your mediator to explore issues and identify workable solutions. Sessions are flexible—online or in person—and tailored to your needs, promoting clear communication and balanced, sustainable outcomes.
A written record of the decisions reached together, capturing practical arrangements around finances, parenting, or separation. It reflects mutual understanding and can be formalised by consent order if needed.
Mediation doesn’t end with one outcome—it’s a lifelong tool. Families often return to mediation when life changes, using it to maintain open communication and prevent conflict as relationships evolve.
Cost of Mediation
Costs vary depending on the length and complexity of each session.
I offer fixed fees for the initial consultation. After that, I’ll provide reliable estimates or fixed fees based on the scope of the work we agree on.
Every case is unique, so transparency around costs is important to ensure you feel informed and comfortable throughout the process.
Topics Commonly Mediated
Family Planning
Support for those navigating fostering, adoption, surrogacy, or Kafala—with sensitivity to legal and cultural complexities.
Cohabitation Agreements
Creating clear, fair terms to support security and mutual understanding.
Marital Agreements
Facilitating honest conversations around roles, responsibilities, and wealth protection through prenups, postnups, and Islamic marriage agreements.
Divorce and Separation
Helping families reach practical agreements about parenting, property, and finances—with special attention to cross-border issues.
Parenting Plans
Child-focused, flexible frameworks for co-parenting across borders, schools, and schedules.
Co-Parenting Support
Managing transitions, parenting styles, and communication strategies that put children first.
HOUSE RULES
Every family is unique - your family’s needs are unique - and discussions around family matters should be tailored to suit your specific goals: whether that means growing your family through surrogacy or adoption; navigating discussions about finances and co-parenting in pre-nups or post-nups or Islamic agreements before / after marriage; or pursuing a healthy (or 'good') divorce through mediated discussions.
I work closely with clients to offer personal care, creating a collaborative and respectful discussion that prioritizes achieving the best outcome for parent(s) and children, by fostering constructive communication around sensitive financial and parenting matters.
Aim
Approach
I have three guiding principles:
I approach mediation (and if necessary, litigation) through a respectful and structured dialogue. The same holds true in mediation: studies have shown that respectful dialogue significantly increases the likelihood of voluntary agreement and long-term compliance, especially when parties feel they’ve been treated fairly and given space to express themselves.
Family change is often layered with loss, hope, and complexity. From marriage to divorce, research in restorative practices and family systems theory shows that couples and families with structured dialogue are more likely to share experiences and listen to one another, process difficulties, and move forward with greater resilience.
Restorative approaches - rooted in dialogue, accountability, and emotional recognition - support couples and families to reframe their perspectives, especially in times of transition.
Resolution is not about winners or losers; it’s about moving forward.
Whether through mediation or litigation, research shows that when people have the opportunity to be heard and participate in shaping the outcome, the results are more likely to be fair, lasting, and accepted by everyone involved.
Feeling heard and engaged throughout the process is essential—not only to achieve satisfaction with the outcome but also to build a stronger foundation for the future.
Shabana stands out as an exceptional lawyer, combining deep technical knowledge in prenuptial agreements and wealth structuring with genuine empathy and sound commercial judgment.
~MFS
I would like to sincerely thank Shabana for her immense support and professionalism throughout the entire process of preparing my prenuptial agreement. It was not an easy time for me, as I was simultaneously preparing to move to the UAE and get married - a period that was both challenging and filled with uncertainty. Shabana took the time to listen carefully, explain every detail, and guide me through the legal implications of the process, particularly how UAE law applies to me as a British citizen and expatriate. She handled everything with confidence, calmness, efficiency, even when working under significant time pressure. I am extremely grateful for the care and diligence Shabana demonstrated in ensuring my rights and interests as a foreign woman entering marriage in the UAE were fully protected. Her professionalism, emра-thy, and passion for her work really set her apart.
~Client
She brings a rare balance of intellectual rigor and human understanding navigating sensitive family and wealth matters with discretion, clarity, and tact. Her advice is always pragmatic and forward-looking, grounded in both legal precision and strategic awareness of the broader financial landscape.
Shabana gave me exceptional support and guidance through one of the most difficult periods of my life. During a grueling 8-hour mediation, she remained calm, professional, and incredibly focused. What truly sets her apart is her integrity—she always advised me on what was right for me and my children, even when it wasn’t in the best interest of her firm. That honesty and courage showed me she genuinely cared. Because of her expertise, persistence, and strategic approach, I achieved the outcome I desperately hoped for: 100% custody of my kids. - FC
I am deeply grateful and would recommend Shabana without hesitation to anyone looking for a lawyer who is not only highly skilled, but also truly committed to her clients and their families. - Former Client
I visited Shabana for a consultation, I must say how comfortable she made me feel, as it was an emotional time. In this brief consultation, she gave me enough to think about. I will definitely continue using Shabana. - Former Client
Shabana supported me through a high-stakes divorce process, where the future of my company was at risk depending on the outcome. Throughout, she demonstrated professionalism, empathy, and a focus on constructive and practical solutions. - Director
... the pragmatism and 'can do' attitude is phenomenal with advice wrapped up in 'client first' service. - Solicitor in London
Shabana has been my go-to person for handling international private client and family law work with the UAE cross-over for years. She genuinely cares about her clients. - Advocate in South Asia
Shabana's attention to detail and incredible determination definitely set her apart from anyone else I have come across and most definetlye someone you need when going through a tough time. - South Asian Client
LATEST RESOURCES
Couples and Families, particularly living abroad as expats such as in the Middle East, face unique challenges navigating family change across borders.
LATEST INSIGHTS
The UAE has introduced Federal Decree-Law No. 13 of 2024, enhancing protections against domestic violence.
LATEST REFLECTION
The day before I was called to the Bar — a milestone I had worked years to reach — my father passed away.